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09. There's Only Forgiveness

The Boy vs The Cynic
by John Reuben


Now itís in my head cuz theyíre one step ahead
Itís under my skin cuz itís a little too thin
And itís in my heart just to tear me apart
Now youíre feeding off the aggression
Misery loves company and twisted forms of affection
Meet the human heart where hostility lives
Sometimes revenge feels so good that I donít want to forgive
And oh no thus the cycle continues
Itís an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth
Til theyíre all loose and youíre bitter blind and numb
You bark but canít bite because youíre all gums
And is justice ever done are you ever satisfied
Was it about justification or about pride
Stay away from the truth it might teach you things you donít like
My insecurity is out to prove that Iím right

I donít want your apologies
I donít want restitution
I want to hear youíre wrong but I donít want resolutions
I want justice but I donít care for peace
I donít want to be bound but I donít choose to be free
I want for you what I feel inside of me
And as soon as I know what that is Iíll share willingly

It seems like it should be simpler
But the human condition runs from wisdom
And weíre not as bright as we give ourselves credit
We repeat the same mistakes before we can regret it
I tried to let it go but it held me in place
Thereís something better but I donít like the taste
Bitterness is easier to swallow than the sting of grace
Memories can be neglected but impossible to erase
They reappear in different ways
And most of the time weíre not even sure of what it is that we hate
We just follow our feelings into an unhealthy state of being with no plans of leaving


If I let this go then itís all in the past
And if I hold onto it I still have something to grasp
What would we do if we had nothing to fight about
Out of the abundance out our hearts we run our mouths
And tear each other apart and inflict pain and grief
Humanity wouldnít know what to do if we had world peace
So you can take the sign in your front lawn down itís a nice gesture
But mankind likes to go to our war itís in our fallen nature
Neighbors nations corporations races insecurity and hurt works well with retaliation
But donít worry it will be your turn soon
So plot your revenge as you clean your knife wound
And 'I forgive you' is not an option
Itís too uncomfortable
Itís much easier to be miserable than vulnerable
You can save that for the weak and the religious
But there is no justice or no peace, thereís only forgiveness




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