I remember lying on the ground with my heart beating out of my chest. Staring at the ceiling seemed to be the only thing I was capable of doing in an effort to calm down from the intense panic that gripped not only my mind, but my body. It felt like I couldn’t breathe. The last year or so hadn’t been the easiest. I had struggled with fear, insomnia, anxiety, and food allergies that left me unable to eat much of anything.
It was that moment that I knew that I had to commit to change. I had let my emotions of fear, worry, frustration, build inside for years and never set any boundaries to pursue wellness in my soul; that is, until it fell apart with a series of anxious breakdowns. As I lay on the couch for the next several months I made a commitment to get to know the Lord. I felt Him nudge me that my physical and mental healing would be found in being with Him. Not that I had to strive to be good enough for Him; this was a new way of relating to God for me. Just a commitment to show up with an open heart every day and talk to Him. As I did, the truths about how much I’m loved and how I don’t have anything to prove began to solidify in my life.
This is where my album “PERSPECTIVE” came from. It’s a collection of songs about healing with God. It’s about how our fears and worries are not what we think they are, and nothing can ever take away what Jesus has done for us. What if you knew that everything was going to be okay? Would you live differently?
The songs “fight,” “no worries,” and “trust” explore this concept: not that the goal of life is ease or comfort, rather that it will be filled with difficulty, but we have the comfort of Lord and Savior in the midst of suffering. “slow down” talks about assessing what’s important in life and stepping away from needless hurry. The album takes the listener on a journey considering what’s really important. I used to think I wanted an easy life, but I don’t anymore. I want a good one. And everything I will ever need is found in knowing Christ. I got to watch Him unravel all my fear anxiety with His constant peace and kindness, and no circumstance can take that away.
- Sajan Nauriyal