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09. Worth Staying For

Land of the Living
by Jason Gray


I spoke without a stutter through the middle of first grade
Until my little world came apart
When I overheard my father saying that he just couldn’t stay
And my speech broke the same day as my heart
They wondered if I did it for attention
But I think I couldn’t get the question out

Wasn’t I worth staying for?
Wasn’t I worth staying for?
More than 45 years later I still see him at the door
Wasn’t I worth staying for?

We were married up in Washington where the Winter felt like Spring
And our love seemed as endless as that sky
So how could we know the cold that other winters would bring
Or the million ways our promises could die
But I guess that I’m still haunted by the question
Now that there are no more papers left to sign

Wasn’t I worth staying for?
Wasn’t I worth staying for?
Time could’ve made us feel like we weren’t strangers anymore
Wasn’t I worth staying for?

I know pain will be transmitted if it doesn’t get transformed
Though it’s not what I intended I did other people harm
And each time that I tried to love I returned to the scene of the crime
I did my own share of leaving, leaving a trail of wreckage behind

A week ago I couldn’t sleep, I was drowning in my shame
If I could’ve ended it I would
But in the middle of that darkness, somehow I knew God came
And stayed with me until I understood

Wasn’t I worth staying for?
Wasn’t I worth staying for?
I carry it in my body like it’s shrapnel from a war
And the only way to heal that kind of wound
Is to trust the love I'm hearing in the kind voice of the Lord
Saying I'm worth staying for
Worth staying for

© 2023 Centricity Songs & Graybird Songs (BMI) / The Gullahorns Music (ASCAP) // Words and Music by Jason Gray and Andy Gullahorn




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