I follow all the rules
Well, at least I’m trying
Hoping when my days are through
I’ll think I’m worth Your dying
I’ve lived the longest days
Thinking my heart was so bad
Too scared to look in Your face
Oh, if only I had

And is it alright
If I stay here all night
By the shoreline

I cannot believe You are angry or unjust
You have done nothing but have compassion on us
So be near when I’ve given up
Be near me

I’m just like everyone else
We are all hiding
Acting like I have a wealth
Of knowledge and peace
But all I’ve ever wanted
And what men have given their lives for
Is a God who understands my weaknesses
A God that I can love

I believe You are good and righteous
You’ve given me Your reckless love
So be near, be near…



Behind the Song:
'One of my favorite movies of all time is a film based on Martin Luther’s life, Luther. It’s so honest. Some of the most compelling scenes are the ones where he is so visibly struggling with the God of the 15th and 16th century Catholic Church… wondering if He was really as unfeeling and rigid as he had been taught. In one scene, Martin is burying a young boy in the church cemetery… which was forbidden, because it was a suicide, and suicides were sent to hell. There’s a crowd forming on the street, and he looks out at them and says, “God must be mercy.” Every time I watch that movie, I realize how much I’ve been deceived. I’ve been guilted into believing God is something that He’s never been… hard, cold, and merciless; like a kid with a magnifying glass sitting on top of an anthill. When Martin Luther read the Gospels for the first time, it changed everything. There’s no possible way to fit into words how desperate I was for that in my own life… to see God not as a tyrant, but as a compassionate Father. I long to be free from all the lies I’ve accepted about Him… to come before Him in all confidence, knowing that nothing but the fiercest love is waiting for me there.' - Bethany Dillon

“But all I’ve ever wanted/And what men have given their lives for/Is a God who understands my weaknesses/A God that I can love…”