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The Search cover
12. Hate Myself
Album: The Search
Artist: NF
         
 

I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself

Yeah, late nights are the worst for me
They bring out the worst in me
Mind runnin', got me feelin' like it hurts to think
If this is all that I wanted, I don't want it, gotta be more for me
All the core beliefs
And every mornin' I wake up and feel like I am not worth it 'cause I'm at war with peace
I go to Hell, walk up to the corpse of me
Look at the body like, 'You ain't nothin' but poor and weak'
It's kinda weird
Lately I been feelin' like the only way for me to get away is if I pour the drink
That's more deceit, more defeat
Is this really what I'm born to be?
That's what you get for thinkin' you're unique
So poor, but I'm so wealthy
Need help, but you can't help me
What else can the world sell me?
Tell me lies, I still buy 'em like they're goin' outta stock
But it's not healthy

I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself

Yeah, late nights get the best of me
They know how to get to me
Suicide thoughts come and go like a guest to me
But I don't wanna die, I just wanna get relief
So don't talk to me like you think I'm so successful
What is success when hope has left you?
I am not a spokesman, I'm a broken record
Sick of doin' interviews 'cause I hate myself, agh!
Come across like it's so easy
But I feel like you don't need me
When I feel like you don't need me
Then I feel like you don't see me
And my life has no meaning, drain me
Hands out, tryna ask for love
But when I get it, I just pass it up
Throw it away and think about it later
Diggin' through the trash for drugs
Wish I could give you what you needed, but I can't
I'm scared because

I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself

I walk through the ashes of my passions
Reminiscin' with the baggage in my casket
Get lost in the questions I can't answer
Can't stand who I am, but it don't matter
We scream to be free, but I stay captured
Knee-deep in defeat of my own actions
Feel weak, but the peace that I keep lacking
Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it
But I can't have it
Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it
But I can't have it
Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it

I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Hate myself
But it's hard when I hate myself
Hate myself
But it's hard when I hate myself

When I hate myself
It's kinda hard when I hate myself
I hate myself
It's hard when I hate myself


 

More Lyrics from The Search

  1. 01. The Search
  2. 02. Leave Me Alone
  3. 03. Change
  4. 04. My Stress
  5. 05. Nate
  6. 06. Time
  7. 07. Returns
  8. 08. When I Grow Up
  9. 09. Only
  10. 10. Let Me Go
  11. 11. -Interlude-
  12. 12. Hate Myself
  13. 13. I Miss The Days
  14. 14. No Excuses
  15. 15. Like This
  16. 16. Options
  17. 17. WHY
  18. 18. Thinking
  19. 19. Trauma
  20. 20. Time
                 
Check out JFH's Lloyd in his first-ever childrens book!

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This Tuesday, November 10
SINGLES
Seth Davey A New Dawn - Single (independent)

This Wednesday, November 11
ALBUMS
Anberlin Currency [Equal Vision]

This Friday, November 13
ALBUMS
Blanca A Christmas To Remember [Curb]
Amy Grant Tennessee Christmas: 10th Anniversary Edition [Capitol CMG/AG]
Lily Hooten Promise Land [Anotherland]
The Lofi Christian & Commons Worship The Commons Lofi (independent)
outr.cty Green Skies, Blue Grass [Syntax]
Jackie Hill Perry Still Blameless (Deluxe) [Velvet Blue]
Leem of the Earth See [Velvet Blue]
Tye Tribbett V20: First Semester (Live) [Freligious]

SINGLES
Chris Caro 10 YEARS IN A MINUTE - Single [Syntax]
Cutright The Curtain - Single [Syntax]
Jordan Feliz Fast - Single [Centricity]
Josh Grove Glory - Single (independent)
Living Again Get This Far - Single (independent)
Magdalene Rose the terrifying reality of it all - Single [Rockfest]
Hunter Plake Silver Bells - Single [BEC]
Matthew Plante OVEN MITT! - Single [Dream]
Jordan St. Cyr Angels We Have Heard On High - Single [BEC]
Amelia Wells At Your Feet - Single [Hope Lane]
Natasha Zimbaro Emmanuel - Single [Wings]

VINYL
Anberlin Currency Vinyl [Equal Vision]

Next Thursday, November 19
ALBUMS
NEEDTOBREATHE The Long Surrender and The Fellow Passengers of Pain [UMG]

Next Friday, November 20
ALBUMS
Gabrielle Lovelace The Secret of Christmas [Old Bear]
Mountains in the Sea Breakthrough - EP [Dream]
New Wine Worship Ready For More - EP (independent)
The Rogers Family Let's Sing a Song About Jesus [Horizon]
Will Morrison, Calm Worship Collective Christmas Music - Instrumental Piano Holiday Songs (independent)

SINGLES
Francesca Battistelli Messiah (Cinematic) - Single [Curb]
Gracie Binion O Holy Night - Single [BEC]
John Long love deep - Single (independent)
Chandler Marie Merry Christmas Mary - Single (independent)
Hunter Plake Silent Night - Single [BEC]
Matthew Plante PRAISE DANCE! - Single [Dream]
Run51 Wishlist - Single [Dream]
Mike Weaver Homecoming - Single [Curb]

For all release dates, click here!