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The Search cover
12. Hate Myself
Album: The Search
Artist: NF
         
 

I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself

Yeah, late nights are the worst for me
They bring out the worst in me
Mind runnin', got me feelin' like it hurts to think
If this is all that I wanted, I don't want it, gotta be more for me
All the core beliefs
And every mornin' I wake up and feel like I am not worth it 'cause I'm at war with peace
I go to Hell, walk up to the corpse of me
Look at the body like, 'You ain't nothin' but poor and weak'
It's kinda weird
Lately I been feelin' like the only way for me to get away is if I pour the drink
That's more deceit, more defeat
Is this really what I'm born to be?
That's what you get for thinkin' you're unique
So poor, but I'm so wealthy
Need help, but you can't help me
What else can the world sell me?
Tell me lies, I still buy 'em like they're goin' outta stock
But it's not healthy

I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself

Yeah, late nights get the best of me
They know how to get to me
Suicide thoughts come and go like a guest to me
But I don't wanna die, I just wanna get relief
So don't talk to me like you think I'm so successful
What is success when hope has left you?
I am not a spokesman, I'm a broken record
Sick of doin' interviews 'cause I hate myself, agh!
Come across like it's so easy
But I feel like you don't need me
When I feel like you don't need me
Then I feel like you don't see me
And my life has no meaning, drain me
Hands out, tryna ask for love
But when I get it, I just pass it up
Throw it away and think about it later
Diggin' through the trash for drugs
Wish I could give you what you needed, but I can't
I'm scared because

I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself

I walk through the ashes of my passions
Reminiscin' with the baggage in my casket
Get lost in the questions I can't answer
Can't stand who I am, but it don't matter
We scream to be free, but I stay captured
Knee-deep in defeat of my own actions
Feel weak, but the peace that I keep lacking
Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it
But I can't have it
Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it
But I can't have it
Keeps speakin' to me, but I can't have it

I don't see you like I should
You look so misunderstood
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Pray to God with my arms open
If this is it, then I feel hopeless
And I wish I could help
But it's hard when I hate myself
Hate myself
But it's hard when I hate myself
Hate myself
But it's hard when I hate myself

When I hate myself
It's kinda hard when I hate myself
I hate myself
It's hard when I hate myself


 

More Lyrics from The Search

  1. 01. The Search
  2. 02. Leave Me Alone
  3. 03. Change
  4. 04. My Stress
  5. 05. Nate
  6. 06. Time
  7. 07. Returns
  8. 08. When I Grow Up
  9. 09. Only
  10. 10. Let Me Go
  11. 11. -Interlude-
  12. 12. Hate Myself
  13. 13. I Miss The Days
  14. 14. No Excuses
  15. 15. Like This
  16. 16. Options
  17. 17. WHY
  18. 18. Thinking
  19. 19. Trauma
  20. 20. Time
                 
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This Tuesday, October 20
SINGLES
Philip Anthony Mud - Single (independent)

This Thursday, October 22
SINGLES
NEEDTOBREATHE Never Gonna Deserve Ya (feat. Evan Honer) - Single [UMG]

This Friday, October 23
ALBUMS
Bleach The Fox Den Sessions Vol. 1 [Residence Music]
Ernie Haase & Signature Sound Miami Live [StowTown]
Alex Henry Foster The Fragile Beauty (Of New Morning Hopes) [Hopeful Tragedy]
Future of Forestry Sojourner (independent)
Galactic Cowboys What Planet Are You From? [Cosmic Outpost Records]
JJ Hairston Anthems & Prayers (Live) [James Town Music]
m1L The Prelude EP [Polished Arrow]
Myles Maestro IDENTITY CRISIS [Syntax]
Melanie Penn Immanuel - The Acoustic Sessions (Deluxe) (independent)
Procyse I’ve Never Been Here Before [Polished Arrow]
QEW & Cyrus Sonata Chamber Saga EP [Syntax]
Josiah Queen Damascus Road [Capitol CMG]
The Sean Coleman Project Apropos of Nothing (independent)
Sidewalk Prophets Great Big Family Christmas (Live) [Curb]
We The Kingdom Soon The Streets Of Gold [Capitol CMG]
Devin Williams Conquer the World (Live) (independent)

SINGLES
Dave Barnes Christmastime - Single (independent)
Biscuits x albion. dawn - Single (independent)
Mark Bishop Unpack That Suitcase - Single [Sonlite]
Blanca Joyful, Joyful (We Singin' Out) - Single [Curb]
Elan Brio Airplanes - Single [Polished Arrow]
Chris Caro Hannah's Song - Single [Syntax]
Jordan Colle Worthy Of All Of It - Single [Bethel]
Matt Cooper Wonder - Single [QHMG / Quartz Hill Records]
ELEVATION LIVING ROOM BULLS & GOATS - Single [Elevation]
Hillside Recording & Addy Prado Joyful Joyful - Single (independent)
Keep Warm Like You (feat. Relient K) - Single [Real Fun]
Lakelin Lemmings I Ain't For Everybody (Piano) - Single [QHMG / Quartz Hill Records]
LOUDWERX Bass Go Boom (feat. Magic & Bird, Andy Mineo) - Single [Artist Influence]
Mountains in the Sea My Burden Is Light - Single [Dream]
Naveszn Meadow - Single [Syntax]
No Vain Glory MOVE YOUR BODY (PT2) - Single [Syntax]
Jordan Rowe If Jesus Lived In My Hometown - Single [Tape Room / Capitol CMG]
Saints in Exile Haunted Nobody - Single [Syntax]
Skema Boy Worthy - Single [Provident]
Tommis & Company Your Name Is Jesus (Acoustic) - Single (independent)

Next Friday, October 30
ALBUMS
Beach Chapel A Special Place In Heaven (independent)
Kirk Franklin I Am What I Am [Uptown]
The Oak Ridge Boys Buried Treasures [Lightning Rod]
The Hyssongs We've Got a Song to Sing [Horizon]
Various Artists Songs Inspired By The Chosen: Season 1-5 [Capitol CMG]
Vomitorial Corpulence Martyrdomical Symphonanthem [Rottweiler]

SINGLES
Gracie Binion & Mitch Wong Gloria - Single [BEC]
Will Ellis My Yesterday’s Are Gone - Single (independent)
Leem of the Earth The Cavern of Dark - Single [Velvet Blue]
Nai and J Follow - Single (independent)
Hunter Plake It's Beginning to Look a lot Like Christmas - Single [BEC]
Jordan St. Cyr Guide Me Home - Single [BEC]
TobyMac The Hard Times - Single [Capitol CMG]
ZOEgirl I Still Believe - Single (independent)


For all release dates, click here!
 

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